prodigalwatcher | TM 219

219 - Headlines

The things we do don't make the headlines. When the LAPD completes a covert sting operation, netting a dozen or more organized crime luminaries, their triumph is celebrated on the front of every broadsheet in town. When the fire department battles a downtown blaze and saves a half dozen historical landmarks from destruction, or when paramedics make a daring helicopter rescue of hikers stranded in the hills, everyone in town knows about it.

When we turn a nest of vampires into dust, or unseat a would-be demon lord bent on absorbing an entire apartment building's worth of tenants, or avert yet another end of the world, our only recognition is from one another.

Usually, that is.

Gas Main Destroys Building Downtown
One Man Hospitalized, Others Injured

That would have been the explosion of our first offices, thanks to the machinations of Wolfram & Hart. And that would be yours truly that ended up in hospital, thank you very much.

Break-In at So Cal Museum of Nat History
Police Officer Injured, Thieves Thwarted

I rather like the "thwarted", don't you? This was a particularly unpleasant piece of business involving something called the Shroud of Rahmon. One of our friend Kate's least favorite encounters with us.

Mysterious Illness Affects Police Precinct

That mysterious illness being zombies.

Blinnikov Ballet Company's Giselle Abruptly Ends Run

Hmm. Yes, that case.

Priceless Objet d'Art Stolen From Auction House

Wasn't there for that one, as I was otherwise engaged in being a pariah and being shut away from my friends and family. Although I do understand it was quite the adventure.

Bizarre Weather Phenomon or Freak Meteor Shower?

Or, perhaps... mystical fire raining down from a gigantic tear in the fabric of our dimension.

'Jasmine' Hoax Uses Sophisticated Subliminals to Hypnotize Millions

At least they admitted it happened.

Those are just some of the more colorful ones. Perhaps the next time you read the newspaper, you'll wonder about some of those headlines, as well. Of course one of my favourite lines to appear in a periodical was instead a photo caption:

"Virginia Bryce squired by Mr. Wesley Wyndam-Pryce, private detective and bodyguard to the stars."

Though that romance did not end well, I am still fond of my fifteen minutes of fame. It is Los Angeles, after all.

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